It’s the second day of 2014 here in the Philippines, which means that I have 5 days left before classes resume, before I finish all the homework I have boldly set aside two weeks ago. I have two precises to write, several articles to read, an exam to prepare for, and a lot of planning to do for major subjects.
But I’m not afraid, unlike before. I am only overwhelmed right now; I can’t properly focus on these articles for political science because I am so amazed that God is with me right now, doing all these very hard things. There’s also this truth that they cease to be hard hard because He’s the One doing all of them through me.
I know right now that the only thing that is required from me is willingness: willingness to let Him work and willingness to trust Him that all this time spent on schoolwork is not in vain. I will finish these things.
God is like that– He does not condemn you about your failures (“You should have started on this weeks ago!”). He helps you. He showers His grace and blessings upon you, and in the process, in the peak of that amazing moment, you learn and you grow in Him. You learn about why it went wrong, and that experiences fills you with life. This is what I’m experiencing now.
I did not only learn about not cramming. I learned about trusting Him more (God always teaches me about that, but I’ve also learned that there’s not such thing as being able to trust God too much). I learned that His presence– that you feel in your heart and you can’t wrap your mind around– is not only available when you’re worshiping or praying, it is also there when you’re reading about state and business relations, or writing summaries of long political book chapters.
God is a very intimate Father. A very supportive Father. It’s amazing.
There are only 5 more days to go till this vacation ends, but I’m excited now for more of Him. I’m still nervous about what awaits me for the rest of this semester because last year was pretty traumatic, but I know that His superabounding grace surrounds me. Father God promised that He’s with me and I won’t make the same mistakes again, and that’s the promise I am going to get. I believe that.
In the meantime, I will read these articles. With Him. Enthusiastically.